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When I look at this picture of myself, I realize how much
I’ ve grown and changed, not only physically, but also mentally
as a person in the last couple of years. Less than one month
after this photograph was taken, I arrived at the [school’
s name] in [school’ s location] without any idea of what to
expect. I entered my second year of high school as an innocent
thirteen year-old who was about a thousand miles from home
and was a new member of not the sophomore, but “ lower-middle”
class. Around me in this picture are the things which were
most important in my life at the time: studying different
types of cars and planes, following Michael Jordan’ s latest
move, and seeing the latest blockbuster show like “ Phantom
of the Opera” or “ Jurassic Park” . On my t-shirt is the rest
of my life— tennis. Midway through my senior year at the special
[school’ s name] school, the focuses in my life have changed
dramatically.
If there is one common occurrence which takes place for every
single person in the diverse student body at [school’ s name],
it is that we all grow up much faster for having lived there.
I do not know whether this speeding up of the maturing process
is generally good or bad, but I definitely have benefited.
The classroom has become a whole different realm for me.
Before, the teachers and students alike preached the importance
of learning, but it was implicitly obvious that the most important
concern was grades. At [school’ s name] teachers genuinely
believe that learning is the most importance objective and
deeply encourage us to collaborate with each other and make
use of all resources that we may find. In fact, in a certain
class this year, my teacher assigned us to prepare every day
of the week to discuss a certain book; there were only two
require-ments in this preparation— we had to maximize our
sources, gleaning from everything and everyone in the school,
but we were not allowed to actually look at the book. As a
result, I know more about that book than any other that I
have actually read. It is teaching methods such as this which
ensure that we will learn more. Indeed, this matter of “ thinking”
has been one of the most important aspects of my experience.
Whether in Physics or English, I’ m required to approach every
problem and idea independently and creatively rather than
just regurgitate the teacher’ s words. In discussion with
fellow students both inside and outside of class, the complex
thoughts flowing through everyone’ s brain is evident.
However, I believe that the most important concepts that
I have espoused in being independent of my parents for half
of each year, deal with being a cosmopolitan person. The school’
s faculty and students are conscious about keeping all of
the kids’ attention from being based on the school. Every
single issue of global concern is brought forth by one group
or another whether it be a faculty member, publication, ethnic
society, or individual student. Along with being aware of
issues of importance, after attending [school’ s name] my
personality has evolved. First, my mannerisms have grown:
the school stresses giving respect to everyone and everything.
Our former headmaster often said, “ Character can be measured
not by one’ s interaction with people who are better off than
him or herself, but by one’ s interactions with those who
are worse off.” The other prime goal of the school’ s community
is to convert every single timid lower-classman into a loud,
rambunctious senior. Basically, if you have an opinion about
something, it is wrong not to voice that opinion. Of course,
being obnoxious is not the idea. The key is to become a master
of communication with teachers, fellow students, all of who
are a part of the community, and most importantly, those who
are outside of the community.
I do not want to make [school’ s name] sound as if it produces
the perfect students, because it doesn’ t. But the school
deserves a lot of credit for its efforts. Often, some part
of the mold does remain. As the college experience approaches,
I am still the same person, only modified to better maximize
my talents. Although I still have some time to play tennis
and see movies, perhaps one of the few similarities between
this photograph and me now is my smile.
** ADMISSIONS COMMITTEE COMMENTS **
This essay is fairly well written. The essayist makes boarding
school his focus, using it to explain and describe how and
why he has changed over the years. A lot of students write
about what wonderful people they have become, but they fail
to do a good job of understanding and explaining the forces
that prevailed to make them change. This writer focuses on
the strengths of the school itself. He demonstrates the sort
of values it tries to instill in its students such as, “ Encouraging
us to collaborate with each other and make use of all resources
that we may find, ” and “ Giving respect to everyone and everything.”
Because the writer does so, the reader never doubts that the
applicant possesses all the qualities that he credits to the
school. Using this method has two advantages. First, the positive,
upbeat attitude he has toward his institution is rare. Second,
Stanford, for one, recognized that this would reflect well
on his ability to adapt to and be a positive force at their
school.
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